National Adoption Month: The Hanfs and Open Adoption

Nov 4, 2024 | Adoption, Blog

Adoption National Adoption Month open adoption
Michael and Sarah Hanf’s adoption journey is a powerful testament to the importance of openness in adoption. Their path, like many who pursue adoption, was filled with both hope and heartbreak. When the Hanfs first reached out to LFCS, they were navigating the emotional ups and downs of trying to build their family.

“We continued to try to have kids, but after multiple miscarriages we found out we had infertility issues,” Sarah recalls. “We went through several medical procedures, and after five years we were able to have our oldest child, Morgan.” After experiencing the joy of parenthood, they hoped to have another child. However, doctors told them they had only a 3% chance of success if they attempted the same lengthy process. Knowing how painful and unlikely that process would be, Michael and Sarah chose adoption.

Their initial attempts to adopt, however, were marked by disappointment. They connected with another agency but found the experience frustrating and costly. “That was crushing,” Sarah shares. “We were very discouraged… we felt like we were just another number.” After similarly negative experiences with multiple other agencies, they reached out to LFCS in desperation. What they found was a team that truly cared.

“She was so kind and understanding after we had just been through a lot at that point,” Sarah says of the LFCS staff member who helped them. Michael adds, “There were several sessions where we had just us and our social worker answering questions and going over the process. They let us know what to expect and were honest about the uncertainty.” For the first time in their adoption journey, they felt seen and supported.

One of the most impactful aspects of LFCS’s approach was the focus on openness in adoption. “They had panels where we could hear from birth parents, adoptive parents, adoptees,” Sarah explains. “And that’s where we learned the most about openness.” Before this, the Hanfs only knew about closed adoptions, having seen them in their own family. “Both of my sisters were adopted,” Michael shares. “The one hesitation I had was how LFCS was encouraging open adoptions. Through the help of LFCS, we began to realize how special an open adoption can be.”

Michael, Sarah, Morgan, Olivia, & Brooklynn Hanf
Openness in adoption has been shown to benefit all members of the adoption triad—adoptees, birth parents, and adoptive families. For adoptees, open adoption helps them understand their origins, identity, and genetic background*. It fosters a sense of connection and promotes positive feelings toward their birth parents. In fact, nearly two-thirds of respondents from the NCFA’s 2024 adoption survey identified openness as the most important factor for birth parents when selecting adoptive families**. Open adoption also creates a broader, more supportive community for the child, strengthening relationships across the triad***.

Through LFCS’s panels and their own research, Michael and Sarah came to embrace the idea of openness. “I see the birth family as being an important part of Olivia and Brooklynn’s sense of identity,” says Michael. Sarah agrees, adding, “They know they are loved by their birth family, but to interact and feel that love… it made the abstract concrete.”

“Open adoption isn’t just something parents do when they exchange photos, send emails, share a visit. It’s a lifestyle that may feel intrusive at times, be difficult or inconvenient at other times… But knowing how to handle these situations and how to continue to make arrangements work for the child involved is paramount.”

Lori Holden
The Open-Hearted Way to Open Adoption

Today, Michael and Sarah have completed their family, having adopted their daughters, Olivia and Brooklynn, through LFCS. Alongside their first child, Morgan, the Hanf family is now filled with love, light, and laughter. Michael and Sarah are deeply grateful for the support they received from LFCS. “They are like part of our family now… They have just gone above and beyond more than they have ever had to do,” Sarah says. “The care that they give the birth family, the care that they give us, it means a lot to me.”

Through their story, the Hanfs hope to highlight the transformative power of openness in adoption and encourage others to embrace it as they did. For them, it was the key to building the forever family they had always dreamed of.

* https://www.americanadoptions.com/blog/10-things-that-scientific-research-says-about-open-adoption/#:~:text=Openness%20allows%20them%20to%20better,10
** https://lavenderluz.com/ncfa-adoptee-research/#:~:text=1.,/religious%20views%20(38%25)
*** https://www.bravelove.org/stories/healthline-the-long-term-health-benefits-of-open-adoption/